darkness again the last two days or so.
wondering if this darkness has it's source in the last darkness;
whether the way out of that darkness might be the way out of this one too.

but,I forget again, there are never any roadmaps
and it is mere foolishness to hark back to 'old routes'.

which is surely just how it is with my music too isn't it?

do I know who my enemy is?
when I knew I could fight.
and fighting made me strong.

who is my enemy now?
still just doubt?
or something more rebellious?

my situation corners me
and I must do my best to trust in a barren place

and yes that is how it is with my music too
-------------

wanted today to make a little opera of the story of balaam and bakal.
I won't be able to of course.