yesterday's solutions dissolve away and cannot help.
throw away the maps because this is new territory.

there is an urgent need to discard all that weighs me down
because none of the old load can help, however helpful it had seemed.

today I was thrown up against the wall and saw ancient stones:
huge and worn;
lasting.
the temple?
the wall is the temple?

I have almost always misunderstood the wall.
I have to realise that the wall is not barrier but presence.

the levites: the leaven of the old covenant.
but jesus was not levite.

today it seemed that the music has to go,
but then:
a wider horizon and a glimpse of dawn.
thinking about it now: the music does have to be let go
although the music will still be there anyway:
differently formed
differently understood

the wind buffeted the car;
the town below twinkled at me:
the psalms my bridge across the ancient hills beyond

something happens when I read the psalms.
I say the words but the words stay on the page and draw me in.
they tell me who I am and give me life.
they are true in a way I cannot understand except as I read them.
they are my music

identity.
or perhaps we start off with a false notion of one.
I must lose false identity to find the real one.
today in the psalms, identities came and went,
but mostly went.
I was glad to be working for others.
God

is it really so simple?
yes it is.
how is it that I forget?
swathes of wasted time and effort
when it stares me in the face:
gift: not refused.