the last post proved helpful.
my main enemy - musically as well as spiritually -
is uncertainty,
doubt,
self-doubt,
timidity,
fear of imperfection,
hesitating,
lack of courage . . .
I myself am the enemy
but, once this hesitant position is adopted,
the rest of the world is quite happy to play along.
it says,
'so you are a victim?
then be the victim:
we trample at your command.'